What can you expect when dating a Vietnamese girl?

By Doug •  8 min read

Have you ever wondered what it’s like dating Vietnamese girl? I’ll admit that it was something that I was very clueless about in my younger years – especially since Vietnam had been closed off to the world for so long. I knew very little, and all I had were general assumptions, but I was very much intrigued. Thankfully, I’ve learned a lot since then, and I’ve got a lot of exciting things to tell you about dating women in Vietnam.

Although I’ve never personally had a Vietnamese girlfriend, I have had plenty of friends that were both Vietnamese and girls. They told me things. Things about life in Vietnam. The culture. Even what it’s like to date Vietnamese girls.

I don’t know. Maybe they were sending me a signal or something? I do know that I was extremely stupid and naïve back when I was young and single, so it’s highly likely that I totally missed all the signals they were giving out. I blew it.

If you’re also really bad at figuring out how to tell if a Vietnamese woman likes you, don’t worry. It happens to the best of us.

All the things you can expect when dating a Vietnamese girl

If I could go back in time, I’d slap myself silly for not pursuing any chances that I had to date Vietnamese women. My Vietnamese friends (both men and women) have been some of the nicest and kindest people that I’ve ever known. It’s an amazing culture.

And if you’re attracted to Asian girls, Vietnam is a place where you need to be looking. Here’s what you’re going to need to know about having a girlfriend from Vietnam:

You’ll laugh. A lot.

More than nearly any other eastern Asian country, Vietnamese people aren’t afraid to laugh at themselves. When dating a Vietnamese girl, you can fully expect to hear a lot of corny jokes.

You will also hear a lot of jokes related to her own culture and the way she talks. I’m not sure if it’s because Vietnamese people are self-conscious about the way they speak, but it’s not uncommon for them to make light of the fact that it’s very difficult for them to speak English.

And the best part about this? It’s OK to laugh with them! They know they are being silly, and they want you to laugh with them.

Vietnamese women

They may look serious – but the Vietnamese have a very good sense of humor!

However, there’s something very important about all this that you need to know: Let her make the jokes first. After all, nothing will end a relationship faster than offending her when all you’re trying to do is to be funny.

Let her drive the humor at the beginning of the relationship. Get a sense for what she likes and what she doesn’t like, and then go from there. If she’s OK making fun of the way she talks, it likely means that you’re OK to make jokes as well.

Get ready though. Being with a funny Vietnamese girl likely means that she’s going to be laughing at you and your culture is well. It goes both ways!

She’ll be happy with the simplest of things

Dating in Vietnam is very different than it is in other parts of the world. It’s a country with a very low cost of living, and it’s not a culture obsessed with luxury brands and status symbols.

Of course the people there can (and do) appreciate fancy things, but the fact of the matter is that most cannot afford them. Dating a girl from Vietnam who has spent nearly her entire life there will teach you a thing or two about humility and the appreciation for the little things in life.

Dating Korean women means that you’ll forever be trying to satisfy her with expensive things. The same thing goes for dating Chinese women as well.

However, Vietnamese girls are different. While they are very much aware of luxury western brands, they typically don’t feel as much of a need to obtain them compared to women from other parts of the world.

A successful date with a Vietnamese girl doesn’t need to be complicated:

The bottom line is that you’re not going to have to spend a lot of money to make a Vietnamese girl happy. This does not mean that you need to be cheap of course. Treat her like the queen that she is, and she will reciprocate in kind.

Vietnamese food

Vietnamese food is incredible, and it’s going to be extremely difficult to screw up taking a Vietnamese girl out for authentic Viet cuisine.

You’re going to learn more than you’ve ever wanted to know about Vietnamese culture

Another really interesting aspect about Vietnamese people that I’ve learned over the years is that they are extremely proud of the heritage. The country of Vietnam has been through a lot over the past hundred years or so, and not much of it has been good.

However, the people of Vietnam have persevered, and they are proud of how they’ve been able to overcome very dark periods in their history.

If you’ve never dated a Vietnamese girl before, you’re in for a treat:

  1. She’s likely going to be very eager to teach you how to speak Vietnamese (if you can’t already).
  2. Not only that, she’s going to want to show you her hometown. As soon as possible.

My advice: show her that you are interested. Showing any little bit of disrespect towards her and the way that she was brought up is going to end the relationship in a very quick manner. Be a gentleman and listen to what she has to say.

Chances are, even if you’re not all that interested first, you will be once you listen to what she tells you. Vietnam is an amazing place. You may be shocked to find out what it’s like directly from the mouth of someone who has lived it first hand.

You are going to learn how to be a really good English teacher

Because Vietnamese people have difficulty speaking English, you can expect that your Vietnamese girlfriend is going to be asking you a lot of questions about proper pronunciation.

The problem with native Vietnamese speakers and the English language is that they physically cannot pronounce some specific sounds (such as “ch”, “th”, “sh”, “j”, and “z”). Much like how native English speakers have difficulty pronouncing German and Dutch, native Vietnamese struggle pronouncing things that are completely natural to someone born and raised in the west.

The bottom line is this: while there will be some humor in the inevitable miscommunications you’ll have when dating a girl from Vietnam, she is going to be persistent about learning how to be a better English speaker.

This is also beneficial for you, as it will teach you more about the English language and how to explain things in a clearer manner. This is one of the main things I discovered when I started dating my Japanese wife back in 2009.

Even though I’m a native English speaker born and raised in the United States, I quickly learned how little I knew about the rules of English when she started asking me very basic questions about proper sentence structure and pronunciation. This will be a learning experience for the both of you!

Wrapping it all up

As rewarding of an experience it can be to date a Vietnamese girl, it’s also really easy to mess up. Vietnam is very much like Japan in the sense that honor and respect is a core part of the culture.

Dating in Vietnam means having respect for your partner. If you’re not showing honor and respect for your girlfriend, she’s very likely to leave you. I know this to be true, because every one of my Vietnamese friends have told me stories about bolting from a relationship in which they didn’t feel loved and respected.

Other than that, the only other thing you need to do now is to be proactive and start looking for somebody nice. For that, I always recommend FriendsAsia as a starting point. Meeting Asian girls on Instagram is always a possibly as well. It’s hard, but definitely possible.

Just be patient, take your time, and chances are high that your Vietnamese dating experience(s) is/are going to be one of the best experiences of your life.


Doug is just an ordinary white guy living in the midwestern United States. He's been married to an amazing Japanese woman since 2010, and has created AsiaGraphix.com to share his experiences with international dating and marriage (the good and the bad),

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