Six valuable lessons I learned from dating Korean women

By Doug •  8 min read

Back in my single days, I dated women from a wide variety of east Asian countries. Looking back on it, I’d have to say that women from Korea were both the best AND worst in terms of being quality relationship material. Here are the six most valuable lessons (and interesting tidbits) I learned from dating Korean women over a span of about 15 years:

  1. Korean women are much like American women
  2. Korean women are extremely emotional
  3. Korean women can be incredibly flaky
  4. Every Korean woman that I’ve ever met has been able to out to eat me
  5. Korean women aren’t generally into white guys (at least compared to women from other Asian countries)

To be honest, my interest in Asian women started with the Japanese. It eventually morphed to an attraction to Chinese women once I realized my American personality might be too strong to date Japanese women.

Dating Korean women was different. Women from Korea are very different compared to women from other Asian countries, and it felt more like a natural fit for me. Of course, it wasn’t all fun and games either – since what I enjoyed about dating Asian women (the politeness, kindness, respect, etc.) was somewhat lost and I felt like I was dating American women.

Dating Korean women is a little bit different. Here’s why:

Before jumping into all the reasons why I think dating a Korean woman is a little bit different, I just want to say that these are my own personal experiences. I’m not proclaiming all of what I’m about to write to be scientific fact, but it’s data that I’ve personally gathered over 15 years of dating in Korea.

1. Korean women are very much like American women

As an American, I am very aware of how loud and obnoxious this culture can be sometimes. I’m not knocking it, but I’m not afraid to say the truth. I’ve been all over the world many times over, so when I compare myself and my American culture to what I’ve seen elsewhere, I can confidently say that were a little bit loud and crass sometimes.

So yeah – dating a Korean woman is very similar to dating an American women because of how similar the two cultures are. Korean culture is extremely outgoing and opinionated. Korean girls aren’t afraid to say what they think, and they tend to hold a lot of prejudice against other Asian countries.

I can’t even begin to count the number of times I started dating a new Korean woman only to have her go into a tirade against Japanese or Chinese people within a day of meeting her. The first time it happened I thought I might have found a bad apple – but when it kept happening over and over again, I began to realize that Koreans are extremely passionate about politics and voicing their opinions.

This is something that I discussed in my article about the differences between Japanese and Korean women, so if you want more of my opinions on this, do be sure to give that a read.

2. Korean women are extremely emotional

This only seems natural after what I told you about how political and opinionated they are, right? Dating a Korean woman is the ultimate test of one’s sanity. One day she’ll be the cutest and bubbliest woman you’ve ever met, and the next she’ll be refusing to get out of bed because she’s either really mad (or sad) about something.

In all my dating experience over the years, my relationships with Korean women were always the most difficult. I’m not saying that they were the most fun (because some of them were) – but I always felt like I was juggling a ticking time bomb that could go off unexpectedly at any moment.

Seriously – I had absolutely no idea what to expect on a day to day basis while dating a Korean woman. It was always a confusing and somewhat difficult venture.

That being said, being emotional is one of the signs that a Korean woman likes you.

3. Korean women can be extremely flaky

As beautiful and amazing as I think Korean women are, I really hate to admit that they are typically the most flaky. For example, in my experience, a Korean woman will think absolutely nothing of stringing you along in an extremely flirty way one day, and then completely ignoring you the next.

Every single Korean women that I have ever dated has flaked on me at least once. Most of them did it regularly.

For all of you guys out there interested in dating Korean women, I have some advice for you:

Be prepared for an endless string of unanswered DM‘s and or emails even after you think you’ve really hit it off with her.

Experience has taught me not to panic. She’s just being extremely flaky, and she’s not blowing you off. Just give it a little time, and she’ll be back as flirty and giggly as usual. Trust me.

4. Every Korean woman that I’ve ever met has been able to out eat me

If you’re not familiar with Korean culture, you need to know that food is an extremely big part of it. Dating a Korean woman means that will spend most of your time together eating. Sometimes it’ll just be the two of you, and other times it will be with her entire family – cousins, grandparents, siblings and all.

It’s because of this special relationship with food that Koreans are able to eat an extraordinary amount in a single sitting. That’s my theory anyway.

The most important thing you need to know is that you will be absolutely shocked by the amount of food that your tiny little Korean girlfriend can eat. I consider myself a pretty strong either myself, but I have never been able to eat as much as a Korean woman can.

Pro tip:  if you are having a hard time trying to figure out where to meet Korean girls, start with restaurants (especially bread shops).

5. Korean women, in general, aren’t all that into white guys

Again, this is my opinion only based on my own personal experiences. You see, a lot of western guys go to Asia looking for love because it’s so difficult to find at home. They hear stories of how easy it is to meet women in Asia, primarily because of how Asian women find white guys irresistible. That might be true in some areas, but it’s definitely not the norm in Korea.

Based on my experience, dating Korean women was just as difficult (if not more) than dating white women here at home in the US. Korean women are extremely superficial (just like American women) and they tend to date within their own race.

Not only that, Koreans don’t generally date as much compared to other cultures. They are usually far too busy with things like school and work, and dating is simply an afterthought for many. This is precisely why people are having less children (and the population is declining) in Korea right now.

If you’re a white guy looking to find a girlfriend in Korea, all I can say is: good luck. It’s not going to be impossible, but just know that it’s going to be a little more difficult compared to finding a girlfriend in other Asian countries. My best suggestion? Head on over to eHarmony and see what you can find…

A few final thoughts about dating Korean women

Let me be completely honest. I find Korean women to be (by far) the most beautiful woman on the entire planet. However, if I was single again and on the prowl, I’m not really sure how much time I would spend trying to find a Korean girlfriend.

Maybe I’ve just had bad luck or something, but every Korean woman I have ever met has strung me along in a somewhat painful and annoying stream of flakiness and confusion. Whenever I felt like I was making real progress in that it was turning into one of the best relationships I’ve ever had, she would suddenly flake out on me and force me to reset my expectations.

Being with a Korean woman is like riding a roller coaster. Sometimes you’re up, and sometimes you’re down. Either way, you’ve got a hold on really tight and not let go because will be in danger of being thrown from the ride if you can’t keep it together.

Good luck out there.


My name is Doug, and I'm an ordinary white guy living in the US. 10 years ago I married a Japanese woman that I met online, and it's been an adventure to say the least! I started as a way to share all the lessons I've learned about dating (and ultimately marrying) an Asian woman.

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