I’ve already written loads of tips and tricks that white guys can use to meet Asian women (using Twitter and Instagram is the best way IMHO), and while that’s all nice and helpful, I get the following question a lot:
Just how realistic is it for a Caucasian guy from the US or Europe to meet and have real relationships with women from Korea and Japan?
You’ll note that I’m being very specific when I say “Japan” and “Korea”, because saying “Asia” instead is far too broad and would be difficult to give specific guidance in a single post such as this. I’ll talk about how easy (or difficult) it is for white men to meet women from other parts of Asia in future posts, but for now, let’s just focus on South Korea and Japan.
Is it *really* possible for white men to meet Japanese and Korean women?
Yes! I know this for a fact, and I believe it 100%, because if a nerdy white guy such as myself has been able to date Japanese and Korean women my entire life, anything is possible. Marrying a Japanese woman (which I did in 2010) was the icing on the cake. I’m not going to lie when I say that it’s been a difficult and stressful road at times, but I’m living proof that such a thing is possible.
The most important thing you need to realize is that, just like with anything else in life, you need to set realistic expectations:
1. If you’re an overweight guy with bad teeth over the age of 30 (heck, even 25), you’ll have no chance hooking up those cutie J Pop and K pop girls you see all over Instagram
Face it – that’s life. However, there are literally hundreds of millions of attractive and single Japanese and Korean woman looking for a relationship (JapanCupid and KoreanCupid are good places to look). And they’re not just in Asia – check out my post outlining the best cities in the world to meet Asian women, and you’re likely to find that they are closer than you think.
2. You need to have a flexible temperament and be somewhat compassionate (more than you would be with a western woman)
Again, you need to face reality here – Japanese and Korean culture is pretty much the exact opposite of yours, and she is going to have problems at times accepting your western ways. You can’t get mad when she tells you that wearing shoes is off limits in the house. You can’t show a look of disgust when she asks you to fold your dirty clothes before putting them in the hamper. Your decision to be in a relationship with a Japanese or Korean woman is a very big one (more than you think) and you need to have the personality for it.
3. A surprisingly large number of Japanese women are attracted to the “Harry Potter” type
This isn’t surprising considering how much the Japanese value simplicity and boyish charm in a relationship. As a matter of fact, you’ll have a much better chance meeting a Japanese woman if you look more like Harry Potter than Dwyane Johnson. Sorry, meatheads – no matter how charming you may be, Japanese women are (for the most part) not interested in body builders.
4. Results don’t happen overnight
Be prepared to be looking (and trying) for years, and if at first you don’t succeed, try again. Nobody ever said that dating Asian women was easy, but the good news is that dating websites such as JapanCupid and KoreanCupid makes the process of trying again and again very easy. It took me 5 years of trying before I ended up meeting my wife on JapanCupid, and even though I met a handful of others along the way (that didn’t work out) I’m still friends with some of them to this day.
You will also need to spread out your efforts a bit, with Instagram being one of the best social media platforms right now to meet other people. Be sure to check out my post which I outlined step by step instructions on how to meet Asian women with Instagram!
You know how the saying goes: anything is possible if you are determined enough to make it happen. It’s 100% guaranteed that you won’t meet the Korean or Japanese woman of your dreams if you don’t make enough of an effort, and it’s all up to you to make it a reality. And when it comes right down to it, this point is the most important of them all and it’s not even worth saying anything else.
The effort you put into this will directly affect the results you get, so get out there and make it happen – and as alway, be sure to report back and tell us your success story in the comments below to help inspire others!